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What a superbowl party is really like

This is what real life Superbowl party hosting is like. Tay Tay banter included..  First you prep for the big event by spending hundreds of dollars on food that only half will be eaten. You know this going in yet still tell yourself that the more food the better. This is for 20 people Just prior to the Kickoff , words of Taylor Swift already begin. Kids continue to ask if Taylor will be performing.  Some of the adults will be yelling because they lost the “will she show up for the Superbowl or not” bet. Kickoff starts and you realize that someone named blah blah has already won the Bonus 0-0 payout in your Superbowl box pool that you dropped a hundred on. You say hmmmm and already start having conspiracy theories as its someone who is related to the person running the pool.  End of the 1 st draws near . Its only been an hour since the company has arrived and already the food that was beautifully prepared...

The Apocalypse: Homeschooling Part 1

If Michael has 5 oranges and gives 2 to Kelly who eats 1, how many oranges are left after Johnny gave Michael 4 more and Kelly throws up 1?

This is life right now. 

More like:

If Daddy gets 30 min of work done and Mommy gets 0, how many drinks does Mommy and Daddy need to drink in order to get by these next few weeks or god forbid months?

Or

Daddy and Mommy are stressed. They each have a bit of anxiety over everything going on. Their breathing is a little faster than usual. Do they:

A) have Coronavirus
B) need to immediately have a drink
C) self quarantine themselves for 2 weeks and let their kids live on their own until then
D) run around the neighborhood and scream “Help us all!!!!”

As I type this, we are teaching our kindergartner how to write the letter h correctly as she loses her mind over it. Meanwhile, my second grader learned that she can talk-to-text on the iPad school app which means she does not shut up. And every 3 minutes someone is yelling at someone about something. And every 10 minutes someone is hungry. And every 10 min and 30 seconds Mommy and Daddy are yelling we don’t have food to spare. And every 11 minutes we are then worried about food. And every 15 minutes we panic when someone sneezes... 

If each child has 4hrs worth of work with no teacher to help, and Daddy and Mommy each have 8hrs of work, how many days will it take for Mommy and Daddy to go mad?

I’m guessing 3?

Perhaps this is the best approach (note: this is not my kids)




We shall see! 

Godspeed

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