May the 4th be with You -- An Ava Story

As the 6yr anniversary of my child's birthday creeps near, I cant help to think of one fascinating, mystifying, eeny, weeny, itsy, bitsy bit of information that was passed by my sometimes empty brain.  Ava, my oldest daughter, was born on May 4 --- which in the world of everything Holy is Star Wars Day aka May the 4th Be With You!

Ava's original bday was like May 16th (my Wife is totally shaking her head in disappointment because thats totally not the right date).  Ok.  May 14th. One of those.  And because she is so bad ass and wanted with all her might to meet her awesome parents, she decided it was time.  So 2 weeks early she made her entrance to this wonderful Earth making me unaware of my holy dates.

But that birth was not just any birth. Oh no siree.  There is a story -- like always -- i gotta tell (not like Biggie) on how the start of that wonderful 15 min of C-section hell for my wife came to be.


We arrived at the hospital. My wife checked in to Facebook with "Having a baby" as every happy Mom should do.  They took Rose and I into some waiting room where they did all weird shit on her. She got naked. I got a little excited and had to restrain myself.  And then they took her away from me to prep her up to deliver our gift to this world.

As the Dad, your just like some dude hanging around with nowhere to go.  They quietly sit you down and tell you they will call you. I am sitting in front of the door, back turned to it, with a shower cap on my head, meth lab Breaking Bad style full jumper covering my entire body and soul, and sweet little linen booties to cover my shoes to match.  A true baller. 

So there I am, phone in hand, on Facebook reading all the Congratulations and Good Lucks from people who have no idea who we are (lets face it prob 20% of Facebook friends are really your friends. Come on people) I am all alone in a room with a lot of empty beds and gadgets and instruments and behind me my wife has a whole team of people slicing her all open and taking her organs out to take out our baby.  Crazy.  And me, i am just hanging out doing nothing.  Exactly what i was doing the entire pregnancy.  Dam we Men got it soooo good!

I was probably there for about 15 minutes but felt like 7 hours.  I was bored, nervous, overly excited and terribly scared.  In literally 20 minutes I would be a Dad. My world will forever change.  I started to contemplate of where my life will go, how good of a Dad I will be, how good of a Husband... and then it happened.

CNN pops up on my phone with a Breaking News.  But not just any breaking news.  No. Terribly, awful, worst news ever.

Yo.  For real?!  My heart sank. I began to feel this strange water sensation hit my eyeballs. Something others have called "Crying" although i dont know what this means.  I was a major Beastie Boy fan growing up. Like huge. And now MCA has passed -- on my daughters soon to be birthday!!  NOOOOOOOO .... and then seconds later "Ok Danny. You can come in now!" came from the door behind me.  

My heart raced like OJs bronco on the LA Freeway.  MCA just passed and now I am having a baby.  I was numb to it all. I walked in and saw all types of machines and heard strange beeps and noises.  There laid my wife on the table with all kinds of drapes and lights around her and tubes and shit coming out of different places.  A bunch of doctors, or nurses, or just people in linen clothes and masks, hovered around my wife like they were all examining her beautiful vagina.  They all greeted me with bloody hands and plastic smiles.  I nodded and made my way to my wife who looked pale and cold. 

There are some things in my life that I wish I can take back. Like things I have said or did, i can write a very long blog about it.  But this one time, the most important moment of our lives, I said these words to my wife upon seeing her for the first time as she is about to give birth to our first child. 

OMG.  You'll never guess who died!!!!

Yes. I did.  Those words came out of my mouth.  That happened. 

And so of course my wife freaks out and asks a hundred questions all in 3 seconds.  And so I then lifted my phone to show her the breaking news of MCA on my iPhone screen. 

Yes. I did. That happened.

Within seconds, I realized the obvious:  MCA died for our sins and is now resurrected into our daughter Ava -- MC Ava

Yes. I am pretty sure I said this.  No no. I know I did. I just think I waited until after she was born to say this.  I hope so. 

So there you have it.  MCA aka MC Ava was born and the rest is history.  We are now an ultra happy family of 4 with a phenomenal MC as a daughter. 

And now back to Star Wars...

With all the excitement of the sudden and surprising 2 week change in C section plans, the death of a legend, the resurrection of MCA and the birth of our daughter, I never understood or realized there was an actual Star Wars Day.  And it's her Birthday!!!  Seriously, life cannot be more perfect.  

To those who are fans of the Bart's and our awesomeness, our MC Ava and our little Star Wars baby -- May the 4th Be With You. 

One