10 Reasons Why Mom's Rule

On this Mother's day...

Being a Mom is truly a gift.  Although I am not one, i cannot speak directly but I can say that having a daughter and watching my wife in action really puts it into perspective.  My mother kicked ass as a Mom and you don't realize how good of a job she did until you get older and learn to appreciate the difficulties that come with being a parent.

Having said all that, Mom's rule and here are 10 reasons why:



1 - They have boobs.   Duh.  This is a given.  It's amazing how those beautiful sacks of goodness actually give off life-needing milk needed for survival.  It's awesome, yet weird at the same time.  

2 - They are natural nurturers.   When a baby falls and hit its head it cries to Mommy.  When a baby gets scared shitless because it thinks the balloons are alive and coming to eat her, they go to Mommy.  When a baby shits all over itself, they go to nobody.  But Mommy is the first person to clean up the mess.  When a baby wants to play, they goto Daddy!  (at least mine does) :-) 

3 - Did I mention they have boobs?

4 - They can multi-task like a mofo.  I find it amazing how a woman can do the laundry, clean the kitchen, make dinner, vaccuum the floor, clean up hubby's mess and still look pretty all while holding her baby.  It truly is an art. The only thing i can multi-task is watching TV while playing Candy Crush on my iPhone. 

5 - They know every nursery rhyme and children's song.  Perhaps this is just my wife but i feel that she knows every single word to every song ever when it comes to children songs.  I can barely sing my ABC's.  

6 - They have the power of sleep.  I dont know how they do it but their soothing voice can put any baby to sleep.  Well, eventually I guess.  Men dont have the patience to rock a baby to sleep.  We'd rather be watching Sports Center.  (I made believe I was a man there as I'd rather be watching Bravo.)

7 - Duh, they have boobs.  And when they're pregnant, they get bigger!

8 - They keep EVERYTHING in order.  My wife is the glue to our household.  If she wasn't there, EVERYTHING would be out of place.  Somehow Moms know how to keep our daily lives in place. If she wasn't there, my daughter would be wearing a 3T boys outfit while drinking soda out of a bottle.  The house would be a disaster and our refrigerator would be filled with protein shakes and beer.  

9 - They create life.  Let's be honest.  There is not much a man needs to do to create a child.  We have sex.  That's it.  Then we just wait.  Meanwhile, the woman is going through a billion changes in her body as she carries this amazing thing called life inside her.  Every man should be respectful and loving towards Moms just for this.  One time I didn't poop for a week.  The pain was terrible.  I complained about it everyday until Doomsday came.  My wife carried my daughter for 9+ months.  Her body went through a slew of changes.  Her back hurt her.  Her sides hurt her.  Her ribs hurt her.  Her boobs hurt her. Yet she didnt complain nearly as much as I did when i couldnt poop for a week.  Guys suck. 

10 - And finally... they have boobs.. duh. 

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL THE MOMMIES OUT THERE!  THANK YOU BECAUSE WE WOULDN'T BE HERE WITHOUT YOU!